I’m not sure what made me think of all this when it comes to death, and truth be told, I’ll be having chemo soon, so that’ll be near-death (probably), but I needed to write something today, so here it is.
I’m not sure I was near death, but I had a fever once and I was hallucinating so badly that I wanted to die. I definitely had an out-of-body-experience, which scared the crap out of me. I have no idea how many times I’ve been close to death, and the nature of my congenital heart defect would suggest it has been more than once, especially with all of the incredibly high fevers I’ve spiked. But this one in particular…well, here’s the story:
It was Christmas time, and I was living in a girls’ home in northeastern Colorado. As you might imagine, from us all living in close quarters, illness made several rounds. Now, I’m not a sick person, so it takes either a LOT of germs or completely foreign ones to make me come down with even a sniffle. I’m not sure what this was, but I spent a significant amount of this particular night hallucinating that there were carolers in my room in the form of the Christmas lights that hung around my window. They were singing and talking to me in voices of people past and present, and I just laid there and cried and sweated to the tune of Jingle Bells and O Come All Ye Faithful. I can’t imagine my fever was lower than 105,